The Grand Inquisition

No, I'm not talking about the Spanish Inquisition, I'm talking about the Climate Change Inquisition which is unfolding right here, right now. I must be quick, for I don't know how long I have before they find me. For you see, my friends, I am being hunted for I am a heretic, an unbeliever! Shocking, I'm sure, but reality none the less. As we speak High Priest Bob Brown and his Inquisitors hunt people like me. I can hear them now, signing a variation from a song which was sung back in the 12th Century, at the time of the first great war against the heretics:

"The Inquisition, what a show! The Inquisition, here we go! We know you're wishin', that we go away! So come on you Deniers and you polluters, We've got big news for all of yous! You better change your point of view today! 'Cause the Inquisition is here and here...to... stay!"

Why am I pursued by this unruly band of thugs? Am I a murder, cheat, or thief? No! I have merely dared to question the word of the prophet Al Gore, who descended from Mount Sinai with the holy PowerPoint presentation which would govern how we are now to live our lives:

"Renewable energy is the one true source of power generation, you shall have no other electricity generation before renewables!"

"You shall not covert fossil fuels, for these are false idols which lure you with the promise of baseload generation!"

"Honour thy Leftist Parties, for they know the true path to salvation. Scorn them for the wicked conservatives and their deceitful promises of economic prosperity and growth and you will be damned for all eternity!"

But I refused to live by their dogmatic rules, their claims built upon shaking science and the black-magic art of global weather modelling. And it is for this reason that they curse my name...

"Denier!" they scream "He dares questions the Almighty Science!" And so I run; I do not consider myself a denier, however it appears that the true believers hate all who simply do not share their fanatical devotion.


Behold! Rising sea levels! The Almighty Science is unquestionable!

I can understand this behaviour in the 12th Century, but now? In our supposedly, enlightened era? We have the true believers, zealots and fanatics such as Bob Brown, GetUp! and Greenpeace, who shout down and decry all who dare question the science. I hate to be the bringer of bad news, High Priest Brown, but while numbers may not lie, the people behind them can... and do! Climate Change Scientists are not going to get government funding by disagreeing with your political position on global warming, so they tell you what you want to hear in order to keep the dollars flowing.

Of course my research is independent and free of bias... By the way, when is the next round of funding?

Science is a business just like any other. Your income is grant money and your deliverables are scientific reports which can be used for political gain. While it might be nice to have completely ethical scientist tell us what's really going on, I doubt you would be interested, Senator Brown, if it didn't fit your agenda. Then who would be denying the science, Senator Brown...?